Defeat gender ideology

Alienating Behaviors and Their Role in Undermining Family Dynamics

The phenomenon of alienating behaviors, long studied in the context of high-conflict divorces, provides a framework to understand how emotional and psychological manipulation can destroy both intrapersonal and interpersonal relationships. In recent years, similar tactics have been identified in ideological contexts, such as in cases where children are groomed into rejecting their biological sex and their biological family. Let’s explore how alienating behaviors manifest within this context, how they parallel classic alienation strategies, and what the long-term impacts are on the child’s mental health and family dynamics.

Understanding Alienation in the Context of Trans Ideology

Alienation occurs when one entity, typically an influential figure, systematically erodes a child’s relationship with their biological family. This process is not limited to separation or divorce scenarios but is increasingly seen where children are encouraged to embrace a new identity that distances them from their familial origins. This form of alienation is often subtle, disguised as support or validation, but in reality, it manipulates the child into rejecting their family and adopting an identity that is aligned with the goals of the alienating group or ideology.

In cases involving transgender ideology, alienation can manifest through a range of behaviors, from the subtle (e.g., emphasizing that the family is not supportive) to the overt (e.g., blocking family access and encouraging the child to keep secrets). These actions can have devastating effects on a child’s identity, emotional health, and sense of safety. The child becomes dependent on the alienating group for emotional validation and begins to see the family as an obstacle to be overcome rather than a source of love and support.

Alienating Behaviors in Trans Ideology: Gender Trafficking

Gender Affirming Care is a behavior that causes a child to become alienated from their family of origin. Alienation within the context of trans ideology is complex and multi-layered. It typically involves key influencers such as the legal system, peers, educators, social media figures, and mental health professionals, all contributing to the erosion of the child’s familial bonds. The following are specific behaviors that resemble classical alienation tactics but are tailored to the ideological context:

1. Negative Framing of the Family: The alienator (which could be a peer, school personnel, counselor, or online influencer) consistently frames the biological family as harmful, ignorant, or unsupportive. For example, if a child’s parents do not immediately affirm a new gender identity, this is presented as evidence of parent rejection or even abuse.

2. Emotional Manipulation: The alienator may emphasize their role as the child’s “only true support,” thereby positioning themselves as the sole source of acceptance. This creates an emotional dependency where the child feels obligated to reject the family to preserve this newfound support system.

3. Secrecy and Isolation: Encouraging the child to keep secrets from their family—such as new pronouns and other social translation efforts—creates a private bond that the family is excluded from. This behavior fosters distrust between the child and their family, further entrenching the sense of separation.

4. Exclusionary Language: The use of “us” versus “them” language solidifies the divide. Phrases like “they don’t really understand you” or “they’re trying to control who you are” serve to create an in-group (the affirming community) and an out-group (the biological family).

5. Reinforcing Victimhood: The child is often encouraged to see themselves as a victim of their family’s non-affirmation. This tactic makes it difficult for the child to see the family’s actions as loving concern, framing them instead as oppressive or damaging.

The Impact of Alienation on Children

The impact of alienation is profound and multifaceted, influencing not just the child’s relationship with their family but their entire sense of self. Alienation undermines the child’s ability to trust their own perceptions, creating a form of cognitive dissonance that affects their emotional stability and reality testing. This can manifest in several ways:

1. Identity Confusion: Alienated children often experience intense confusion about who they are and where they belong. This confusion is compounded in ideological contexts, where the child is being told to reject their foundational identity (e.g., biological sex) in favor of a constructed one.

2. Emotional Instability: Children subjected to alienation show higher rates of anxiety, depression, and mood disorders. These emotional disturbances are often mistaken for or exacerbated by gender dysphoria, leading to inappropriate and potentially harmful medical interventions.

3. Long-term Psychological Harm: The child’s ability to form healthy relationships and develop a stable sense of self is severely compromised. Alienation teaches children that love is conditional, based on compliance and adherence to specific beliefs, rather than unconditional and rooted in who they are.

Characteristics of the Ideological Alienator: The “Glitter Family”

In this context, the term “glitter family” is used to describe the affirming community that replaces the child’s biological family. These groups often exhibit behaviors that are eerily similar to the classic tactics of alienating behaviors in high conflict divorce cases:

1. Rigid Black-and-White Thinking: The glitter family tends to view the child’s biological family as “all bad” and themselves as “all good.” Any disagreement or concern expressed by the biological family is seen as hostility or bigotry.

2. Emotional Manipulation and Dependency: The child becomes enmeshed with the glitter family, taking on roles that are inappropriate, such as being responsible for the emotional well-being of adults in the group.

3. Encouragement of Defiance: The glitter family promotes defiance against the biological family’s rules or guidance, framing any opposition as an act of bravery or authenticity.

4. Role Reversal: The child may assume a caretaker role, being told that their “bravery” in embracing a new identity is inspiring to adults around them. This role reversal places an enormous psychological burden on the child.

What Can Be Done?

Addressing alienation in the context of trans ideology requires a nuanced and sophisticated approach. The following steps are essential:

1. Early Identification: Professionals, including therapists, educators, and judges, must be trained to recognize the signs of alienation, such as secrecy, language changes, and sudden rejection of the family.

2. Respecting Parental Rights: Efforts should be made to include the biological family in any intervention process, rather than immediately excluding them based on the child’s expressed preference. The focus should be on repairing and strengthening family bonds.

3. Watchful Waiting: Educators and counselors should provide the child with balanced information, emphasizing the value of patience and exploration rather than immediate affirmation and irreversible medical interventions.

4. Legal Interventions: In cases where alienation is causing significant harm, legal intervention may be necessary to protect the child’s well-being. This could include limiting contact with individuals who are actively undermining the child’s relationship with their family.

Love and Truth as the Foundation for Healing

The antidote to alienation, whether in the context of divorce or trans ideology, is love rooted in truth. Parents must maintain a stance of unwavering love, even when faced with rejection. For children caught in the crossfire of conflicting ideologies, the presence of a stable, loving family can be a lifeline.

Biblically, the family is designed to be the primary place where children receive guidance, love, and correction. “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6). Alienation disrupts this divine design, placing children in a state of emotional and spiritual turmoil. The goal should always be to restore the family unit and guide the child back to a place of wholeness and truth.

In the end, combatting ideological alienation requires vigilance, love, and an unwavering commitment to the truth that each child is fearfully and wonderfully made, as they are, and deserves to be loved and accepted without manipulation or coercion.

By Rebecca Smith, MA, LPC-S